Searching for a lifetime wife!

During the last couple of months, I have been in the process of searching for a good match to be my wife! I did not try any online services, just asking my family members and closest friends.

Lucky me, there isn't any kind of success until now... it seems that there is something wrong with girls nowadays, ... well or may be something wrong with me to a tiny bit :)
I know I am not that good looking, not that rich, not that funny or even not that wise guy.
But on the other hand, I must have some good *attractive* points to someone out there in the outer space.

Thoughout my short experience, either ( I will call the candidate match the *target*) :

• The target got engaged before I start the hand-shaking process.
• The target is already engaged.
• The target refuses after the hand-shaking process with her, and her family.

Well, this has to be for some good reason, which I don't know right now.
May be because time has not come yet for me to enter this golden cage *mariage*.

I am not very smart in dealing with girls. Just treating them like sisters.
May be because I have only sisters, I treat every girl as a one.
I have never tried to gain the love of any of the many girls I knew in my life.

And at work, I seek to gain my female colleagues' respect, but never their love ... may be because I feel it is not a place to find a lover there.

I think I need to revise my tactics and strategies, as the rate of failures I am hitting right now may make feel disappointed ... but as a baseline, as long as there still remains a single proper match, I will always try!

In all cases, it is them who are the LoSeRs :)

A new start x 5

Next Thursday will be my first working day for my 5th employer since my graduation in 2001.
It is hard to tell how I feel, yet I know for sure I am feeling excited to avoid all the weak points I made throughout my short 5.5 years career life time.

I am feeling good to be able to start from the begining for the 5th time in this short period.
It makes me feel I am alive! Change is the only fixed truth in this life -besides that there is a God for sure-

I know that it is very hard to switch jobs so frequently. Just because it is really hard to find a job in the first place :)

I am very spiritually thirsty these days. Change makes me feel I am still possesing some value for others that makes other employers need me!

Through out my last-and only- four jobs, either:

• I was given nonsense tasks to do, and yet not being recognized for doing them.
• I was given some semi-challenging tasks, and yet not being encouraged for doing them.
• I was not given any task to do, and yet not being appreciated for not doing them.

Now what do you think? For me, It is a pure heavy load of disappointement. I feel like all those employers not smart enough to fully utilize me. They are just like someone who is hiring a nuclear reactor for lighting a 100-watt bulb.

My perfect work type is to squeeze, scratch and overload my idle creativity cells. I believe I didn't do what I can really do until now.

What I need is a motive... a good motive. I need to be proactive. I need to be self triggered. I need to feel the value of whatever I am/will be doing.

Why am I writing this?

Just asking you to wish me good luck in my next turn over :)